Getting a grip....

Okay...my second blog. I have been through a blog tour and now.... I am sort of getting a grip of what this site is all about.
Its like my life.... I'm slowly getting a grip on it as well, as I learn more about myself and about people around me.

I always thought that I was a very extrovert girl(and I was to an extent) and then 'bang!'
Reality check.... I get nervous and shy around people who can see through my extrovert bull****.
I used to have loads of mates at school... thought I was this friend-magnet. I had more than I could handle and then when school was over and I walked into the real world 'bang!'
Reality check.... I have made...what.. 2 friends in my 4 years out of school. (many mates at work, but thats all on a Hello Hi basis..no more and no less!!)
Same can be said about the professional field that I'm in. I thought I was a very creative gal who would make fame in the world of webdesigning etc.. and (yes ! again) 'bang!'
Reality check.... I've chosen a Business IT degree after a huge arguement with my multimedia tutor during my diploma..swore never to turn back to multimedia again!

Similar has been the case with many other phases of my life. Making a long story short, I somehow keep following dreams that I think are best for me...till I fall on my face or somehow I'm shook hard by reality only to find that I'm actually the opposite! (or better if I followed the other way!) It would have saved me so much time and energy if I knew in advance what I'm supposed to do..where I'm supposed to go... instead to walking into deadends all the time.

And then...I think if that was to happen, I would still find myself writing another blog complaining... why is everything so straight forward...why don't I have the opportunity to take risks...take chances. So I stop.

Days go on.... and I try to hold on to my beliefs but still making new ones as old ones get shattered by 'bang!' Reality check!!