Monday, June 27

Inertia - *Move... d#$% it!!*

in·er·tia (-nûrsh)
n.

  1. The tendency of a body to resist acceleration; the tendency of a body at rest to remain at rest or of a body in motion to stay in motion in a straight line unless acted on by an outside force.
  2. Resistance or disinclination to motion, action, or change.

Today is one of those days when things are out of whack for no reason what so ever! And there is nothing I can do about it either.....

I mean,

- Homesickness is engulfing me like a dark blanket and I cant for the life of me think straight any more.... I want to go home right now and every news/rumor of someone going back to India makes me ache inside. I think - "Take me with you. In your luggage or something...anything!!"

- There are things *I think* 'I need' to buy for myself.... (for a while)... but cant. Because I'm afraid that I'll feel guilty later... that I should have postponed it a bit more. Since when did my bills and financial commitments become more important than "my peace"??

- I have to start working out a plan for my career...what I want to do in the coming months - continue where I am or move on. Being where I have been for almost 5 years.... the thought of leaving is very frightening. I don't remember being interviewed for soooo long!!

And I cant run away, because I know that I'm the kind of person who needs stress to feel alive!! Its ridiculous and its just pricking me from the inside.

There are goals but they seem so far away -- almost out of reach.
There are tasks to be completed -- almost impossible to be finished.
There are things to be said -- almost unable to form them into words.

There are .........oh so many things... -- don't even know where to begin!!

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